The spring season here in Colorado has been very chilly and snowy. Those of us who live here are so grateful that we are beginning to see more sunny days, hear the birds chirping, and see some buds blooming on our trees and flowers. Although the year has truly been “Spring time in the Rockies” with its unpredictable nature, we know eventually it will be beautiful, green, and lush!
 
Our life often feels like this, too. Cold, dreary, dry, and longing for some sunshine! I am so thankful that God gave us a wonderful promise in Isaiah 58:11 that says, “The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail” (NIV)
 
It is such a comfort to know that even in the dark and hard times of life, God has promised to make us like a well-watered garden. Our heart’s garden has an unfailing fountain bubbling continually, even when we can’t always feel it. God never quits watering our soul and life! He causes us to grow and flourish in spite of our struggles. Psalm 92:12 reminds us, “The righteous will flourish like a palm tree…” (NIV). Where do palm trees grow and flourish? In the desert! That’s amazing! Their roots go deep and tap into the water flow! The palm tree goes against the “status quo” of trees and seems to enjoy thriving in the desert. So, just because your life may have the appearance of a desert, you can rest confidently in God’s promises that His love, mercy, and tender care are watering your life and you are still thriving and flourishing! Proverbs 11:28b says, “…but the righteous will thrive like a green leaf” (NIV). If you’re righteous, then you’re thriving and green. You are a well-watered and beautiful garden!

Let’s continue on with a review of principles from God’s Word that show us how to communicate in a way that brings honor and deepens the relationship between a mother and daughter.

Celebrate Your Common Qualities

Whenever I go back to Oklahoma to visit my family, I constantly hear from all of their friends, “You look JUST like your mother!”  “You sound JUST like your mother!”  “You’re gifted JUST like your mother!”

I’ll be honest with you and admit that in my younger years, hearing those comments used to drive me nuts!  What in the world did they mean?  Of course I’m not like my mother!  Why couldn’t they see me for who I am – as an individual?

But over the years, I have come to appreciate these comparisons to my mom, and I even consider them as the ultimate compliment.  I recognize that I have inherited from her my ability to teach, my sense of humor, and my overall love for life!

To enrich your relationship, be aware of and celebrate the positive qualities that you share.  Talk with each other about the things that you both love.  Let it be known that you recognize the gifts and abilities God has so graciously imparted into both of you.

“…whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things” (Philippians 4:8 NKJV).

Let Grace Abound

It is important to come to grips with the fact that your mother / daughter is simply not perfect.  She may not always see things in the same light as you.  She may not always agree with the way you do things.  But, nevertheless, she is yours!

“And above all things have fervent love for one another, for “love will cover a multitude of sins” (I Peter 4:8 NKJV).

Decide that you are willing to overlook her imperfections.  Focus on the good whenever possible.  By learning to extend forgiveness and grace toward her, you will create a godly pathway of communication; one that will endure for a lifetime.

To summarize, the communication principles we’ve reviewed:

1. Make Love the Primary Focus
2. Prepare the Ground with Affirmation
3. Celebrate Your Common Qualities
4. Let Grace Abound

God’s Word is always our best resource and guide for life, isn’t it? If we can begin to communicate with these principles in mind, we will see a dramatic turn in all of our relationships. And, for that special mother-daughter relationship, we may see a new blossom that will enhance the beautiful bouquet that is this unique connection.

This coming Sunday is Mother’s Day and this week we are looking at the mother-daughter relationship, which is a unique gift from God; one that can be compared to no other. As a mother, you look into the eyes of your daughter, and see a reflection of yourself. It is your heart’s desire to see her flourish.  You long for her life to be filled with blessings!

As a daughter, you know without a doubt that your mom would go to the ends of the earth for you.  When it comes down to it, you know that no one “has your back” quite like she does.

You talk with each other about every aspect of life; you share each other’s victories, as well as your struggles. You are connected to each other with a bond that will never be broken.  You have invested an incredible amount of love, emotion, and time into each other.

So, why is it that conversations often sound like this?

“You’re driving me crazy!”
“You’re not listening to a word I’m saying!”
“You don’t understand me at all!”

In spite of the strong connection between you and your mother / daughter, it is okay to admit that communicating with her in a healthy, godly way can at times be tough.

Webster’s Dictionary defines communication simply as “a verbal or written message.”  With that in mind, it is important to ask yourself, “When communicating with my mother / daughter, what messages am I really sending to her?”

The God of the universe is the Ultimate Communicator.  He has given us 66 chapters that send the message of how much He loves us.  As we look to Him, we can learn how to send that same message to our mother / daughter. Over the next couple of days we will review just a few principles from God’s Word that show us how to communicate in a way that honors our mother/daughter, as well as God.

Make Love the Primary Focus

The Word of God tell us, “Let all that you do be done with love” (I Corinthians 16:14 NKJV). The idea of “love first” seems obvious. But although we all know that love is the key to all relationships, it can be easily overlooked if not carefully guarded.

The Bible also reminds us that “…out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks” (Luke 6:45b NKJV).  Life has a way of creating pressures, disappointments, and problems that can take a toll on your mind, will, and emotions.  Be mindful to not allow the stresses of life to push the love out of the time spent with your mom or daughter.

One thing I love about my mom is that she ends every one of our conversations with an “I love you!”  Whether our time together consists of laughing about something silly, or hashing through a disagreement, I can always count on hearing those three precious words before we say goodbye!

Prepare the Ground with Affirmation –Starting Today!

My mother believes that I am the most brilliant, anointed, powerful woman on the planet; at least, that’s how she makes me feel!   At times, it can almost be embarrassing going out with her, as she constantly tells anyone who will listen – whether we know them or not – how wonderfully accomplished I am!

Over the years, my mom has continually tended to the ground of my heart by speaking words of encouragement and affirmation over me.  As a result, these words have “softened the ground” producing healthier, life-giving communication between us.

As often as possible, verbally re-establish that you truly believe in your mom / daughter.  By cultivating the ground of her heart with words of edification, you’ll find she will be more open to what you have to say in the future, especially when discussing a difficult or sensitive issue.  After all, receiving correction or constructive criticism is much easier when you know the one giving it loves you unconditionally and is on your side!

“A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver” (Proverbs 25:11 NKJV).

Ladies don’t forget Ladies’ Night In Bible Study is TONIGHT! We are so excited to have 13 new classes that are perfect for any age. The fun begins tonight at 6:30 PM.  If you haven’t done so already, sign up today and join us tonight for an incredible time of food, fellowship, and powerful teaching.

To register, click on the image above or if you need more information on each class click on the “Class Descriptions” link below.

Class Descriptions

Join us this Sunday evening, April 28th for a Gayla Family Event entitled, Thrive! The fun begins at 5:45 PM with food and fellowship in the foyer, followed by special teachings at 6:30 PM for the men, women, and children. You will learn how God wants you to thrive, flourish, and have overflowing blessings in every area of your life!

Ladies Night In Bible Study is next Tuesday, April 30th @ 6:30pm and we would love to see you there. Sign up online today by clicking on the image above, or if you would like more information about each class click on the “Class Descriptions” link below. Come be a part of our fun girls’ night full of delicious food, wonderful fellowship, and incredible teachings. There’s something for every age! Hope to see you next Tuesday.

Class Descriptions

Proverbs 3:3 – “Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart” (NIV).
 
Love is a gift from God that is pure, true, and full of compassion for others. Faithfulness is one of the fruits of the Spirit expressed through our character, deeds, and actions. Faithful people keep their promises and commitments; they are reliable, loyal, and can be trusted to keep their vows. We should demonstrate God’s love and faithfulness to others, just as Christ did. Are you faithful to your family, friends, and those around you? True love is said to be self-giving, not self-seeking. God loves us unconditionally and remains faithful even when we disappoint Him from time to time. Today, let love and faithfulness be displayed in your interactions with others.

Last week we began the journey of looking at different tools that help tend the garden of our soul.  This week we will look at the other two essential tools in the gardening kit.

 Shovel and Hoe

“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice” (Ephesians 4:31 NIV).

Life’s events and broken relationships can often leave us extremely broken. A heart broken due to betrayal, loss, an unfaithful spouse, or rejection, to name just a few, has a greater possibility of developing a root of bitterness. That bitterroot becomes the taproot from which any number of negative spirits can become attached. The entangled root system becomes a web of negativity –unforgiveness, anger, resentment, jealousy, and offense. The shovel and hoe work on the roots that run underneath the soil in our soul’s garden; these roots are not visible until the soil is turned over. There are times when the small hand shovel just isn’t enough; that is when we grab the imaginary, full-sized shovel in the corner of our prayer closet and frantically begin digging out the entire root system. Just as with the dandelion, if the taproot is not totally removed, the plant will grow back. Managing the anger, jealousy, or resentment is not the cure; we must proactively go after the root system through the guidance and direction of the Holy Spirit until every root is removed and we repent of our grievous offense against our Heavenly Father.

Watering Can

“Jesus answered her, ‘If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked Him and He would have given you Living Water’”(John 4:10 NIV).

Although two-thirds of the human body is composed of water, just two days without water will cause the body’s kidneys to begin to shut down. Death would be eminent. Water is essential for the physical body! In John 4:10, Jesus speaks to the Samaritan woman, telling her that He is the Living Water. Reading on, Jesus answers the woman’s question posed in verses 11-12 concerning the water from the well with: “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but those who drink the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life” (John 4:13-14 NIV).

Ladies, just as our physical garden craves water from our watering can, our soul’s garden is thirsty for the outpouring of the Living Water that flows through our intimate relationship with Jesus Christ. Through the Holy Spirit’s presence in our lives, our soul’s garden can be free of the unwanted, unhealthy growth and roots, then fertilized with the Bread of Life and hydrated with the Living Water, Jesus Christ. The work is an ongoing process. Just as with our vegetable and flower gardens, there will be a continual need for trimming, pruning, hoeing, digging, and raking. But the benefit to this emotional toiling is that we are working with a purpose in one’s heart. The result is a healthy soul – one that is beautiful and fruitful and a blessing to everyone around us.

Ahh, the smell of spring is in the air! Spring showers are here, and the grass and trees are getting ready for this year’s summer growth. Our environment is becoming a luscious green palette, and we find ourselves anxious for the upcoming months of summer gardening. Whether we are serious gardeners or weekend enthusiasts, everyone enjoys the beauty of the colorful floral landscapes, as well as the delicious vegetables that are available to us through our hard work and conscientious effort.

I often compare the garden, its needed maintenance, and its resulting fruitfulness (or non-fruitfulness!) to that of my own soul. It is then that I ask myself, “How does my garden grow?”

Being a true visual learner, the gift of a small children’s gardening kit sitting on the table next to my prayer chair has become very thought-provoking for me. The tools within that gardening kit have become a daily reminder of the work the Holy Spirit and I do during my quiet time with the Father. Each tool is used for a specific purpose; all are used to rid the garden of my soul of the weeds that grow as a result of life’s painful events and circumstances, and that keep us separated from our Heavenly Father. 

Let’s work together to create an instruction manual for each tool in our gardening kit.

Pruning Scissors

“I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit He prunes, so that it will be even more fruitful” (John 15:1-2 NIV).

Webster’s Dictionary defines pruning as “the act of cutting away what is unwanted or superfluous.” As we see in John 15, time spent with the Master Gardener can become painful when we are in the pruning season. Each of us has unwanted growth that bears no fruit in our lives. “Unwanted growth” can be activities, habits, relationships, language, or even thoughts that need to be removed from our lives. Anything that prohibits us from achieving our God-ordained destiny will be cut away so that our growth is focused on the fruit-bearing branches.

The Master Gardener will also prune away branches in our life that are producing fruit. God is always looking to the future; the purpose of pruning these fruitful branches is a greater harvest in the years to come. As an example, ministries can be put on hold simply for the purpose of preparing ourselves for the next level of God’s all-knowing plan, through separation and study.

Are there areas in your life that God is trying to prune in order to make you more effective in His kingdom?  Join me next week as we look at two more essential tools that are useful in our gardening kit to tend the garden of our soul.

Ladies don’t forget Ladies’ Night In Bible Study is TONIGHT! We are so excited to have 13 new classes that are perfect for any age. The fun begins tonight at 6:30 PM.  If you haven’t done so already, sign up today and join us tonight for an incredible time of food, fellowship, and powerful teaching.

To register, click on the image above or if you need more information on each class click on the “Class Descriptions” link below.

Class Descriptions