Make God the Ultimate Parent – Part III Tips for Single Moms

I am so thankful that I have never been alone in my parenting journey; although it has been tough at times. God has been by my side every step of the way; he always leads, guides, directs, and comforts me.

# 3 – “…and a little child will lead them” (Isaiah 11:6 NIV).

In the early stages of my submission to God, I’m convinced that He imparted wisdom to me through my children, who were able to hear from God at a very early age. For example, Michael learned to walk at eight months old and at 10 months, he noticed that a cigarette had fallen out of an ash tray onto my mattress. He didn’t talk well, but he could point. He found me in the kitchen, took me by the hand, pulled me into the bedroom, and pointed at the cigarette burning my bed covers. As he grew up, he often worried about my smoking habit. He would tell me that cigarettes fried one’s brain, or he would try to quote scriptures to convince me to quit.

Unaware that God was speaking through Michael, I continued smoking until God also spoke through Detavio when he was almost two. He passed by me while I was smoking and said, “God doesn’t like what you’re doing.” When I asked him what he meant, he did not reply. Believe me, it was my last cigarette! Again, at age two and a half, Detavio, unable to read, brought the Bible to me opened to Isaiah 54, and said, “God told me to tell you to read this.” Ironically, at that very instant, I was lying across the bed feeling sorry for myself. I found encouragement in the verses Detavio had called to my attention because they assured me that God would be my husband and that no weapon formed against me would prosper. God knows how to impart wisdom, even through children, to the hearing ear!

#4  – “She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed…” (Proverbs 31:26-28 NIV).

Finally, to keep from being overwhelmed by circumstances, I established functional and purposeful routines. These routines kept me on track. Eight o’clock was always bedtime. My children knew they had to pick up toys, bathe, and get dressed for bed. Bedtime was enjoyable because I put my children to bed with a story, a few songs, and back rubs. Although this may sound like a lot of work, it saved time in the long run. My children never stayed awake complaining about an imaginary monster in the closet, and they never had nightmares. Once I got them to bed, I had time for myself.

There were some things my children and I always did as a family. Our meals were prepared and eaten together at a specific time. I generally awoke early to pray on my own, and then my children and I prayed together each morning before leaving home. We attended church on Sunday mornings and evenings, as well as on Monday nights for prayer. Other routines centered on homework, cleaning house, grocery shopping, and activities such as Cub Scouts and Boy Scouts. Routines helped me not to lose sight of the things I needed to accomplish during the day, and they kept my focus on what was important – my children.

In retrospect, my experience as a single mom has been rewarding, despite the many challenges. In the end, by learning to depend on God, being open to the wisdom He provided, and after carefully planning and establishing realistic goals and routines, I can only say that I am blessed. Today, I know I continue to be blessed just by observing how God now blesses Michael and Detavio in everything they do.

In conclusion, remember these tips:

1. Put God first and cast all your cares on Him.
2. Ask God for wisdom.
3. Be willing to learn from your children.
4. Watch over the affairs of your household